Postive Discipline

Okay, just ONE more book about child development and then I promise to get back to the good stuff. I'm just starting a Jane Austen novel and will soon have my nose buried in a Michener tome, so stay tuned.

My friend Nicole loaned me Positive Discipline: The First Three Years by Jane Nelsen and I'm very thankful she did. The whole idea of positive discipline is kindness and firmness at the same time. That may sound easy to those of you who are not parents, but I find that it's not always as easy as it seems. Nicole and I spend a lot of time talking about how I can up my kindness quotient when Matthew has turned into a crying machine, and she can bolster her confidence in being firm with her little one when he's decided he wants to eat the cat.

The only chapters I didn't particularly care for in the book were the ones dealing with eating, sleeping, and potty-training.* When I mentioned this to Nicole, who is also doing infant potty training with her son, she said, "But the point is not to get into power struggles." She's right, and that's why I think the book is worth reading. While I don't agree that parents need to wait until children are 3 or 4 to start potty-training, I DO feel strongly that we should do our best to avoid power struggles with our children at all times. This book does a good job of showing what that looks like, and it taught me a lot about how to get what I want: a happy, cooperative child.

Jane Nelsen coined the term "positive discipline" and has lots of books and resources for parents, teachers, and caregivers. If this book sounds like something you might like to read, you can go to her website at www.positivediscipline.com. She even has a free e-newsletter with tips and support for dealing with young 'ens!

*If you're looking for support on eating, sleeping, or potty-training for a child under a year, I recommend The Secrets of the Baby Whisperer by Tracy Hogg, How to Get Your Kid to Eat, and Diaper Free: The Gentle Wisdom of Natural Infant Hygiene by Ingrid Bauer.